In the Fire
By Michael Q. Pink
February 15, 2010Yesterday, I spent the day alone doing things that are far richer shared with someone very special, but that was not to be. It was the first Valentine’s Day I have ever spent without those simple words, “I love you” being spoken in my ear by someone who did. While I am confident that better days lay ahead, yesterday was not one of them. But I learned something…
On my walk around St. Armand’s Circle in Sarasota I stopped by Wyland Art Gallery. He is famous for his ocean paintings both above and below the surface. While in there, I watched some video of how they make something like this wonderful glass sculpture you see here.
They start with a blob of molten glass and then begin to fashion it to the shape and image they desire, while using the flame to keep it pliable. While in the flame, the artist uses special tools to redesign, reshape and repurpose the original piece of glass into something new and wonderful. If you take it out of the flame before this process is finished, it will become brittle and stuck and quite likely, useless. Are you getting the message yet?
When you find yourself in the fire, don’t try to get out. That’s where people make their mistake. They try to get out of the flame before the work is done. When they turn out brittle, stuck and unfulfilled they fall back into the flame and start the process all over again. That’s not an option for me. Believe me when I tell you this!
For me, staying in the fire, means staying engaged in life. It means writing when I’d rather not. It means being vulnerable with you when it’s easier to hide or at least put on a front. It means facing life head on with all of its challenges and not avoiding any of them. It even means going for a walk on the beach or on St. Armand’s by myself when I’d rather have the company of someone special. It means grabbing the horns of business opportunity and wrestling one to the ground. It means fighting for life because life is a gift from God and I refuse to treat His gift with contempt!
I have very high hopes for my future and an expectation things will be better than ever. Why? Isn’t that what Jeremiah 29:11 promises? “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you a future with hope.” I will not bemoan what I don’t have, but rather exult in what He has already given me and joyfully anticipate what I know lies ahead… A future with hope!
Be sure to check back here tomorrow as I will be answering the question many of you asked last week about how I began to breathe again…
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Comments (27) - Post a Comment
Would you explain what it really means to stay in the fire and not try to get out.
Valarie at 11:44am EST - February 15, 2010
God bless you richly Michael Pink! this was so dear of you to share. thank you and thank God for your faithfulness from the fire!
goldie leona hayes at 11:45am EST - February 15, 2010
The Holy Spirit spoke this through my mouth this morning during my prayer time: "When I stop facing and conquering mountains in my path I have stopped living." I say "Bravo Micheal" for forging ahead...many will follow.Love,Tamara Kuchera
Tamara Kuchera at 11:49am EST - February 15, 2010
Valarie... In addition to what I wrote above, staying in the fire means doing what you don't want to do so you can become and do what you have always hoped you would become and do. It means embracing the struggle. It means facing the wind. It means overcoming the adversity. It means rising above your feelings. It means sticking with it when it is difficult. It means keeping your eyes fixed on the prize. It means enduring to the end. It means never giving up hope. I could go on and on, but I hope this helps. Blessings, Michael
Michael Pink at 11:50am EST - February 15, 2010
Bravo indeed! I too would like more details about "staying in the fire". With so many people hurting today in a variety of situations, (foreclosure, lack or work, medical coverage, etc....) more details on this topic would be excellent and VERY much appreciated. God Bless you Brother!!!
Bonnie at 11:55am EST - February 15, 2010
being in the fire is when your situation is burning your flesh, and everything in you is screaming at you to do anything to get cooled down! ex: being 'in' love with someone who is not there for you to have... your flesh desires them, your heart is aching, your body is burning with desire! your very soul is yearning to be fulfilled! and so you scream and shout and press and push and pull and do everything and nothing at all, because it is not yours to have and to hold; and you ask Jesus why; and then finally, if you continue to resist your flesh, if you stay faithful and choose life, you are cooled down. shhhhuuussshhh... getting out of the fire is: giving into your flesh, fleshing out, just completely going your own way, without any consideration to what the outcome might be. it is leaving the situation that is burning away your flesh, purifying you.
goldie leona hayes at 12:01pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael, thank you so much for your total honesty and transparency. You continue to be a gift to others even in the midst of so much pain. You remain in my prayers...
Connie Cunningham at 12:26pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael, thank you so much for your total honesty and transparency. You continue to be a gift to others even in the midst of so much pain. You remain in my prayers...
Connie Cunningham at 12:29pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael, you are one of the few people that I know who walk out what they believe. You love and trust God with all of your heart and through all of what you have been through, you let Him shine through you. One thing for sure.....you are not a hypocrite, and that is refreshing. You love Him when you had your wife, and you love Him now, you don't blame Him and run away from Him. Thank you.
Donna Potter at 12:53pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael, I have been one of your subscribers for approximately two years now. Your business sense and now your heart is awesome to behold. I feel privileged to have shared all this through your emails. From the beginning of Brenda's illness I have read each one faithfully and crited through them. I don't usually respond by posting but I just have to tell you that you have enriched my life with your faith in our heavenly Father and as I cried through the illness I will rejoice with you as you walk through the fire. Thank you Michael for being faithful and vulenrable and transparent.Sally FotouFort Lauderdale FL
Sally Fotou at 12:54pm EST - February 15, 2010
It is what you said, Michael. Facing the wind and the adversities of life. Keeping our eyes on the prize. Determining in our hearts, to allow the workings of the fire, so that we come out as pure gold and walk in our destinies. Valentine's Day was surely rough. I recall the first Valentine's Day without my husband(he left me for another woman after 17 yrs of marriage...)and it was very painful indeed. Probably one of the most painful times. Whether it is a death or a divorce or sickness...it's hard on this day to be without the one we loved for so long. I praise God for you making it through that day and being able to share your heart with us once again. Blessings to you. Leisa Coburn
Leisa Coburn at 12:58pm EST - February 15, 2010
The end of the process (yes, the process has an end) that you are going through is that you will be "mature, complete and lacking nothing." I desire to be "mature, complete and lacknig nothing"; I generally don't like to go through the process. See Jas 1.
Gary Geppelt at 1:03pm EST - February 15, 2010
that is what i teach online in minstry ; so many when get saved do not pickup the cross just sit back down ; we are saved by faith and walk out salvation with fear and trembling! we are baptized by water water and fire and power ;; the best way to stay in the fire is seek the kingdom and all the kingdom has to offfer we need the tongues that is jesus praying through us we need the holy spirit that is the lords strength to go through the fire and we have to perserve through the fire ;; in the fire we are turned to image of christ his love for all walks of life alll his passion ! jesus paid a great price and we to will pay but lives are changed and many lives will be snatch from going to hell ! so you have to stay in the fire intmacy with the father and son and holy spirit will get you through ! we have been empowered we are on assignment so like you said gods plans are good plans stay in his plans and press into all he has to offer. time to show a dieing world jesus christ is alive and we can have heaven on earth ! and michael we willl keep your family in prayer and you to walk this out in the arms of the father son and holy spirit ;; let the songs you listen to be so like daddy singign to you and read psalm 91 daily !
diana shepard at 1:41pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael - I find your selection of Jeremiah 29:11 most appropriate. One of the most overlooked things about that passage is that it is part of a letter written to people who are in captivity - the ones carried from Jerusalem to Babylon. In the letter they are told to LIVE - have families, open businesses, plant gardens, increase in numbers - in essence - LIVE ABUNDANTLY in spite of the fact that they are in captivity - in a place where they don't want to be. This seems to me to be exactly what you are doing. I commend you and praise our Father, Jesus, His Son and the Holy Spirit for it! Your friend and sister, M
M Sanders at 1:58pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael, you are truly an inspiration to me. I can recall when I lost my husband of 18 years to a terrible divorce. The 1st year I experienced alot of firsts; ie. just like you, the first being your first Valentine's day without your wife. Throughout this year, you will experience many more firsts, and my heart will continue to go out to you as you face this fire head-on. Keep fighting the good fight of faith, and please keep these blogs coming -- such an inspiration.
Donna in Dallas, TX at 2:09pm EST - February 15, 2010
Your words could not have come at a better time. If we allow it, Valentine's Day can be a painful reminder of people we no longer have in our lives. I don't pretend to understand your pain, but I have my own, as I'm sure everyone else has, too. It's time for me to embrace the refining fire and allow God to fill that void however He chooses. I am safe in His very capable hands. I am through fighting and trying to take charge and do things my way. It's never worked before, and you'd think I'd get the message. I will relax and let Him do what He does best...heal and strengthen. I trust that His plan for me will include a loving Christian partner, because that's what my heart desires, but the time it takes is irrelevant. I don't want to get stuck in the cycle you talk about either, so the sooner I let Him take over, the better for me. You're article has convinced me to stay in the fire until I'm completed and ready for the next step. A wonderful mutual friend in Grants Pass has been sending me your emails for the last several days and knowing what has recently happened in your life and the way you are dealing with it, has shown me my own shortsightedness and wrong attitude toward what God "should" do for me. My selfishness and self-pity (very hard to admit) have held me back from God's best in my life. Thank you again, and praise God for His refusal to give up on me.
Margie Spreng at 4:07pm EST - February 15, 2010
Thank you Michael - your willingness to be transparent is ministering to many people I'm sure. I'm reminded of when Keith Green died, his wife Melodie received a scripture from 3 different people from all around the world. The scripture about "a grain of wheat falling to the ground and dying". Keith's passing brought many, many people to the Lord, and I feel quite sure you don't begin to know how Brenda's going home to be with the Lord will bring much fruit to the Kingdom of God. That may not bring much comfort to you now in your humanness and in grieving for Brenda, but your faith sings through these posts and so does your heart for God.And to Valarie - I know Michael can answer your question better than I, but have you ever read Amy Carmichael's poem "In Acceptance Lieth Peace" ? If not, I encourage you to google it and read it. That's my description of not trying to jump out of the fire before God is finished doing His work in me. Hope that helps.
Ginny Edwards at 4:17pm EST - February 15, 2010
You are still in my prayers, and have been since you shared your wifes condition. I prayed along with you not only for physical healing, but that His perfect will would be manifested in you and your wife's lives. You will come through. Forever cherish the memories, but step out of the past and do what He has directed you to do. As for those who are asking for a map of how you were brought through to where you are now; I believe each one is totally unique, and only by listening to our Lord, and waiting for His instruction can anyone be brought through their own situation. We are all used, some to destruction, some to completion. Thy will be done!!
ken adams at 4:35pm EST - February 15, 2010
When I was reading this it made me cry, it also made me think of Jacob wrestling God for his blessing. He came out limping but extremely blessed. It's really hard to stay in the fire. We want to run screaming, jump, flee but God says wait....it'll be worth it.....wait....you'll see!
Jennifer Lefaver at 5:26pm EST - February 15, 2010
Hey Michael;I was thinking about you and was glad to read your post. How often we wish that our circumstances would be different but those of us who have this GIFT inside don't have to find a way to run from our problems but to stay the course. Moment by moment is Christ's only way. My wife and I were able to go cross country skiing here today in Northern N.J. My health has gotten to the point where I can do it again. I was praising God for this most wonderful time when my cell rang carrying a call with the bad news that a deal just fell apart. The temptation is to worry but I rely on the fact that "Our God shall supply all of our needs through His riches in glory" Oh me of little faith.Sooooooo, it's time to continue to lean and learn. Thank you for being open with us.Ken NEill "Ken the Bell Man"
Ken Neill at 5:31pm EST - February 15, 2010
I feel your pain Michael. I too lost the love of my life my husband and my 20 year old son back in 2007. My husband died suddenly in January 2007 and my son was shot while on the job and died 5 days later, in August 2007. I am someone that does not throw anything out. So I pull out the old Valentine cards that my husband and son gave to me. It hurts but it reminds me how much love there was around us. No one will be able to take their place. And I am still waiting for the shooter's death penalty trial to begin this late spring. However I get through the days with the three "F's", Faith, Family and Friends. Hang in there my friend.
Gail Peluso at 6:57pm EST - February 15, 2010
Thanks, Michael. I guess I will stop wrestling to get out of the fire.
Yvonne C. Hyde at 8:01pm EST - February 15, 2010
Michael, I have been a subscriber for a couple of years now and when you began to share about Brenda, it was like questioning Yahuweh all over again for me. I was married 32 years and part of "ministry" never realizing that "living death of divorce" would happen to me!.You have experienced a death of your lovely wife while I experienced the living death of former spouse who chose the path of Demas. I read each line and heard each word of love and pain and questioning that you wrote. Seemed like same reactions I had to go through in my dark night of the soul. The only way to make it through this refining process that i can share with you......and you will make it.....Stay in His word, transparency is key, walk a lot, weep a lot, forgive a lot, experience each pain, remember the great memories and don't get caught up in the "what if's" and the intense loneliness of suddenly being single again. For a season. In life we are "single" yet Yahuweh promised He would never leave us nor forsake us, we are still betrothed to HIM. I am honored to part of your life online before and more proud in a greater way of being with you in the process now. I am grateful that you have a voice and the site to share with all us as you live each day. Know that we are with you in prayer and in Spirit. Keep pushing forward, the life we live is a great adventure and progress/HIS character is what HE wants for us. The best you had with Brenda was the best ever, I am sure; nevertheless, HE states in the Holy Scriptures as you stated Jer 29:11 ..future of hope with an expected end". Our belief in HIM and HIS word will carry you and I, to what HE has for next. Life only ends when we quit looking forward, knowing that getting there will have to be with believe in HIS word, expectancy from HIM, perservance, pain, tears and a love for HIM as never before. Am honored that we have the same Father and that HE knows and has chosen you as HE knows and has chosen me. Don't be afraid of the stillness, that is when HE speaksand caresses us. As you, I look forward as I walk through the refining of the refiners fire in me, to what HE really has in store for my NOW future. We are filled with Holy Spirit and fire....flaming fire. The furnace of affliction is Father filtered for us all as well. You are a gift to us, and HE will supply each thing you need in every way. He has for me. Yahuweh bless you and keep you, and make HIS face shine upon you. As you press forward to the mark of the high call, ask to see HIS glory!........Darda
Darda Harper at 8:01pm EST - February 15, 2010
I have so much appreciation for your transparent writing. Do you realize how powerful every word is? DON'T STOP! As I read this piece, though I am not in the exact same situation, (but I was going through fire), I felt a powerful impact with each word you used. It is Holy Spirit breathed. You are allowing your emotions to submit to the Holy Spirit and it has the same creative power that Jesus had on the cross... to get up after 3 days, because He submitted His emotions and will and arguments... etc.
Annatjie Heydenrych at 8:30am EST - February 16, 2010
Jeremiah at the Potter's house.......what to you see Jeremiah. Thank You Holy Spirit Amen Amen Amen
Elizabeth at 10:36am EST - February 16, 2010
Dear Michael,I remembered Isa 50:Who among you fears the LORD and obeys the word of his servant? Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God. 11 But now, all you who light fires and provide yourselves with flaming torches, go, walk in the light of your fires and of the torches you have set ablaze. This is what you shall receive from my hand: You will lie down in torment.Thank you for showing it in another way. More Blessings...Benjie@Manila
Benjie B. Caballero at 6:24am EST - February 17, 2010
You, my friend, have learned very early in this grief journey, that you cannot go around grief...you must go through it. Yes, refining fire. After my husband suddenly passed away I journeyed the path you are now going. Days spent absorbing His Word, sitting in the warm sun listening to the sounds of His creation, accepting His peace and love, were the elements of my recovery. I tried plunging back into my life very quickly...while it helped the loneliness, I soon learned I needed to allow Christ to heal my aching heart also and not try to cover the sorry with busyness. He was faithful. Friends tried to fill that hole, some hesitated, others just plain failed...but He never did. Thank you for sharing your journey....if I can walk with you I would feel blessed and honored.
Claudia at 9:45am EST - February 17, 2010