The First Report is NOT the Last Report!

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November 9, 2009

Last Monday my wife and I were up at 4:00 am, had some wonderful time with the Lord over some cappuccino and then took our usual walk around the subdivision lake before having a bite to eat and then diving into work. Other than some apparent sinus congestion and building pressure behind her eye, all was well with us and the world. That was Monday. On Tuesday morning, while doing some exercises on her exercise ball, she lost her balance and struck her head against the dresser. It wasn't the fall that alarmed us... It was the fact that she fell. Something was not right in our world and we went to the doctor to find out. It wasn't the bump that concerned the doctor, but rather the accompanying symptoms and we were advised to go to the emergency room at the hospital for a CT scan. With some reluctance we went. The attending physician got concerned and brought in a neurologist who opted for a brain scan MRI instead. We were still hoping to be out of there in time for dinner and pick up a prescription for what we thought was a sinus or inner ear infection throwing off her sense of balance. Then it came. The news there was a golf ball sized mass behind her right eye. Brenda was admitted immediately and they proceeded to do a full body CT scan to search for cancer in other parts of her body. By the time the tests and questions were finished, it was 1:30 in the morning. We found out the next day, there was no cancer in those other places. We were turned over to a neurosurgeon for consultation on Thursday, and later introduced to an array of cancer specialists, while as yet no one had given us the diagnosis of what was in her brain, other than it was a tumor. We scheduled a biopsy for Friday and initial reports confirmed the doctors' worst fears. The specimen was sent off for a pathology test to confirm what they believe they already know. To complicate matters, during these same few days, my wife has lost the ability to control much of the left side of her body. Simple things have become exceedingly difficult if not altogether out of reach. We checked out of the hospital Saturday to be able to rest at home while waiting on the pathology report. I like to think I can write reasonably well, but I cannot begin to express the anguish of heart to see my wife whom I love more than life, struggle like this while staring at a prognosis that I will not dignify by putting into print. We slept the last two nights in the same single hospital bed, like two puppies snuggled up, taking comfort in the nearness and presence of the other. According to the physician, this would have begun in the last couple of months, roughly around the time when we began to boldly proclaim that God wants you well, that it is His will for us to live a long life and not be struck down prematurely with disease. So here we are now, staring the giant in the face, eye ball to eye ball with everything on the line. A crisis like this has a strange way of focusing you. For me, nothing else matters but seeing my wife recover and live a full life with me. God has spoken to her in the night season while at the hospital and we are pressing into God for His help and further instruction. Conventional treatments are not an option. The tumor is inoperable and, according to them, incurable. Well, as one dear friend told me the other day, it seemed like all the diseases Jesus healed were incurable! No disrespect to the medical profession here, but they had nothing but apologies to offer and absolutely no hope. Orthodox treatments offer only a few months extra time and most of that is spent vomiting or just being horribly sick. Not an option for us. Our hope comes from the Lord. Only now, it's all on the line. We can't just talk it. We've made a decision. Win or lose, it doesn't change the fact that God's Word is true and He can be trusted. I believe the Lord and ask Him to help my unbelief. God healed Hezekiah with a poultice, another man by bathing in a river, and countless others in various ways. We look with expectancy to see Him deliver us in our hour of great need. As we journey on, we welcome and appreciate your support in any form. While we fight this battle, I am not taking direct calls or able to answer emails, but we covet your prayer support and are strengthened by your love and friendship. With love and gratitude...

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